2018-05-22 17:06:53date was

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  • Timmy Mowafi’s essentials

    Timmy Essentials

    Like most of our Sab3a Essentials guests, this one needs no introduction. And while everyone we have on here is very unique, unique is an understatement for such a character. Timmy Mowafi is.. well.. he’s Timmy Mowafi. And here are his seven essentials:

    1. Unis tbm de luxe Typewriter. A friend gave it to me as a gift last birthday. It doesn’t work but it makes bitches think I’m insightful.

    2. On the Genealogy of Morals, Ecce Homo by Friedrich Nietzche – It’s funny how when you’re in school you reject any book given to you because you have this petulance for teachers trying to teach you stuff, dickheads, then I found it lying around the other day and haven’t put it down since, but mainly it makes bitches think I’m insightful.

    3. Empty condom box – It makes bitches think I’m safe.

    4. Samsung Live camera – Bitches don’t know record is on.

    5. My Blackberry – Much like The Picture of Dorian Gray, my Blackberry has become more decrepit the more I corrupt it with hedonistic content… Every single thought I get, whether ingenious or retarded goes straight into my Blackberry memo pad. I’ve written whole books on my memo pad. I morbidly wonder what would happen if it was found if I died in a freak accident. Either whole subcultures or religions would be born from my prose sort of like The Book Of Dave or my parents would have me stricken from the family tree.

    6. My Hair – The top bit of my hair has fallen into this sort of weird wavy quiff that I quite like. I don’t know how it happened or how long it will last but I feel naked leaving the house without it.

    7. Piece of lint – Okay I’ll be honest, I clearly don’t actually own 7 things in my life, any thing nice I have usually ends up wrapped in sellotape, lost or stolen by baltegya. Possessions end up owning you and all that… So here’s a piece of lint I just found which was essential for finishing this list.


    oh and Timmy’s also the star of a new worldwide phenomenon: