Me being privy to what most of you post on your facebook, sometimes at night,”I” just read through the newsfeed, and can’t stop laughing. “I” take screenshots of it and send it to kittie on whatsapp and we have a few jokes about it. So “I” decided to write a post about the funniest/stupidest things people do on facebook.
First off you would have noticed, “I” keep putting the word “I” in between quotes, and that is for a reason. “I” personally hate that word, it means that “I” am an authority on something, for example here right now in this post “I” am writing, seriously who the fuck is Fishie & Kittie ya3ni, they are just some regular joes, what gives them the right to write and critize other people and use the word “I” as if they are something. No seriously who are we! granted “I” have to use that word a lot because at the end of the day its a blog but “I” hate it.
Okay back to the main topic, shit you post on facebook.
So we have established how much we hate the word “I”, so you have some people who go on facebook and post some self declaration that they just discovered this amazing fact. And that it is only true because they said it. For example “I think the world is round”! NO SHIT DIPSHIT! WOW ! NO WALAHI BEGAD? ENTI/ENTA SMART AWI!!!
The people that come up with random words put together to sound like something smart from the book the secret, then sign their name at the end of it, because they are afraid someone would copy paste their genious. For example “All mankind is equal, but not all fingers on the hand are the same” Oh PWEAASSEE does that even make sense?
oh this is my all time favourite, I have no problem with posting one of those every day, but seriously when you post it every single day, what is the point, what you think because you said it that it means its true. No! If you keep saying on facebook and instagram that grass is greener on the otherside, it wont magically turn greener until you get off your lazy ass and go fucking water that grass to make it greener instead of sitting on your laptop writing about it
so you know how we have like a kazllion DJs now, i think there might be more DJs than bathroom stall attendants and there is more event organisers than my … well lets just say a lot. So these are the people that make sure when they go to every party, that they get their photo taken with the DJ or party organizers, upload it on FB/Instagram/Twitter/Shitgram whatever there is out there, to make it to the world know that BITCHES I AM FREINDS With this DJ/Event Organizer.
So you have certain people, me included who would advertise something like maybe a cafe or something. They could be advertising it because you know its a friend who opened up the new cafe, so they want to show support for their friends which is just natural, but this is how it looks like in my news feed when someone opens something new: A STREAM OF SHIT in my NEWSFEED of the name of this cafe, claiming that it is the hottest trendiest spot in town and they have the best CHEF like no other, as if that Chef maslan came from George V (Paris). So naturally you get excited about the place, you want to go try it out, then you discovered that shit this food is so bad i cant even give it to my cat or dog.
I love this one, look i am all for religion, I am religious myself (shocker to some). I love when I see people post religious stuff, who i actually know are religious people, but what i hate is the whole fake religion and fake prayer stuff, its so hyprocrital. You wanna pray for god to give you something, please do it in your home between you and god, do it in the church, do it in the mosque, but really now on facebook? as if God is watching at your facebeook status and would be like oh Person XYZ updated her status with prayer asking for world peace, so I shall grant her that wish!
men have became fat, but not all of them, there is still a remaining dozen who are fit. Women on the other hand are becoming skinnier, woohoo! but what i love about them is this. Oh you get a picture of their body, but not of their face, I swear to god and I kid you not there is this one guy without mentioning names, his profile picture is of his pecs and shoulder muscles! NO SERIOUSLY THAT IS IT. THAT HIS IS PROFILE PICTURE, so you want to talk this guy, just to talk to his boobs! eih el 2araf dah!!!! oh and boys and girls stop fucking sucking in your cheeks, this is no 1990 anymore
Look i can go on and on and and on about this forever.. but why dont you take a chance and tell us what you hate about people on facebook but just leaving a comment down there