2016-12-08 05:59:56date was

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  • How North West’s Life Would Turn Out if Kim Hadn’t Gone Back for Her

    kim-kard

    You know that feeling you get when you think you’re forgetting something important? Kim Kardashian certainly does. A video of the socialite leaving a hotel and suddenly turning around to go back in, only to come back out carrying her daughter (oops?) is currently trending and the subject of a lot of criticism. 

    Here’s how we think North West’s life would turn out if Kim hadn’t gone back for her.

     

     She gets adopted by Angelina Jolie…

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    Her stepmom’s work in the UNHCR teaches her to help the less fortunate instead of spending her inheritance on ridiculously expensive sweats.

     She changes her name to Jane Smith…

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     In the spirit of fitting in, she chooses a ‘normal’ name for herself.

     She doesn’t believe in plastic surgery and enhancements , because she is taught to appreciate her natural beauty…

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    Despite inheriting Kanye’s nose and Kim’s original butt.

     She develops good taste in music…

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    Classical > Hip-hop.

     She joins Taylor Swift’s Squad… 

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    Completely unaware of the beef between T-Swizzle and her birth parents.

     She dates Blac Chyna & Rob Kardashian’s daughter…

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    Is it still incest if you don’t know it’s your cousin?

     She gets a part-time job at IKEA like a normal high school kid in need of pocket money…

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    IKEA are actually impressed with her designs.

    However, IKEA doesn’t pay well, so she moonlights as a Paparazzo to earn money for college…

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    ….Snapping pics of her real mom and dad.

    She gets accepted to Harvard…

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    Because she was brought up to value education over Insta fame.

     She graduates with a degree in Ecology and dedicates her life to fighting for the LGBTQ rights of gender fluid Bearded Dragons in Australia…

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    #ImWithReptiles

    She is secretly Supergirl…

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    Naturally, because all superheroes seem to have been abandoned as children.

     Yeah, she’s definitely better off without Kim & Kanye for parents.

    __________

    By Salma Thanatos Rizk & Ramy Soliman

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