2016-12-05 12:30:55date was

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  • 43 Thoughts I Had on the First Day of Ramadan

    ramadan-thoughts

    I don’t fast. I haven’t ‘experienced’ Ramadan in three years. This is what happened inside my head today.

    1. Good morning, world! I wonder how bad today is going to be.
    2. Will I manage to get anything done at the office?
    3. Well, the roads are pretty empty.
    4. I’ve never gotten to work so quickly.
    5. The office is really empty, too.
    6. I obviously won’t manage to get anything done.
    7. We need to make it clear that ‘Seven Ramadan Tents You Need to Visit’ is a giant lie. None of them are actually tents.
    8. We should stop using ‘tent’ as a metaphor for Ramadan gatherings. Tents are made of real-life, physical fabric. Fabric is not a metaphor.
    9. I’m so disappointed at our negligent and irresponsible use of the word ‘tent’.
    10. OK, I really need to stop saying ‘tent’ now. The word has lost what little meaning it actually had.
    11. On a side note, this image is hilarious.
      https://fbcdn-sphotos-h-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xpf1/v/t34.0-12/11349808_10155780475670046_1625565827_n.jpg?oh=276f9def97ed83ffb4f70259a004fe21&oe=55851303&__gda__=1434786322_78ad324f882ae7b07b672db8851cb78a
    12. LOL tent puns.
    13. My gosh, people really do complain a lot.
    14. Am I allowed to eat in the office? I’m pretty hungry.
    15. It’s only 12pm -  how are people going to make it to the end of the day if I’m starving already?
    16. Does anywhere deliver during Ramadan?
    17. It’s also 40 degrees outside. I need water.
    18. Can I send someone to get me water?
    19. Too insensitive. I’ll go myself.
    20. Well, it’s reassuring to see that Ramadan hasn’t made people on the streets more polite.
    21. The smoking room is now the hub of all of the non-fasters.
    22. If there was a war, who would win?
    23. Are people judging us?
    24. Is it cool if I swear? Maybe I should stop.
    25. Just kidding.
    26. I think the girl sitting on the desk next to mine is about to faint.
    27. It’s cool, nobody panic. She’ll get some God Points.
    28. I wonder if anybody’s going to Sokhna/Sahel this weekend.
    29. More importantly, will they have space in the car?
    30. I’m so glad I stocked up on Ramadan essentials.
    31. Today is so boring.
    32. I shouldn’t be complaining.
    33. OK – no more complaining, Noor.
    34. Maybe just one more… people are pretty inefficient.
    35. I’m really looking forward to 29 more days of this.
    36. This is a real life ‘Hunger Games’
    37. What a clever connection, Noor. You’re so clever.
    38. Is that an inappropriate comparison?
    39. People will understand that I’m only referring to the food.
    40. Even though I’ve actually drawn their attention to it now.
    41. Is it possible that the madfa3 could actually hit somebody?
    42. I need to stop shouting Ramadan Kareem – people are getting irritated.
    43. At least we’re going home at 4.

     By Noor ‘Thinky’ Salama

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